Tag Archives: love

The Gift of Giving

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Jessica Andrews-Hanna, an associate professor in the Department of Psychology, in the College of Science, discusses in detail the psychology and neuroscience behind giving and receiving gifts. There is a decent amount of research showing that the act of giving actually makes us feel better.

The phrase “gift of giving” can refer to a spiritual gift or a general expression of generosity and kindness. It can mean the ability to cheerfully and sacrificially give of one’s resources (time, talent, and treasure) without expecting anything in return.

In the context of Christian theology, the “gift of giving” is a spiritual gift bestowed by the Holy Spirit on specific individuals. It empowers them to contribute generously to the work of God and to meet the needs of others, often going beyond the typical tithe, 10%.

Those with this gift often exhibit cheerfulness, liberality, and a desire to share their blessings, sometimes adjusting their lifestyles to give more. Examples of this gift can be seen in the Bible, such as the Macedonian Christians who gave sacrificially to others despite their own poverty.

Thoughtful and meaningful gifts, whether material or experiential, can be a powerful way to show someone you care. Even small acts of kindness and generosity can create a “warm glow of feeling” for both the giver and the recipient, fostering connection and happiness.

Such as the time at my lowest, in grad school, my advisor often said, “Jerry, let me do that for you.” In under graduate school, one of my classmates would bring me an apple and the other invited me to lunch once per week. My “landlady” would pay my tuition until my “GI Bill” check would arrive.

The act of giving can be a way to express love and appreciation, and can be a powerful way to strengthen relationships. When we were down to no car, one of my teacher friends loaned me a car.  When I tried to repay her, she would not accept it. Another time, one would pick me up from an eatery and drop me off at home.  I don’t have that relationship with men.

Evidence from brain imaging also suggests that both giving gifts and receiving gifts activate core areas of our brain associated with reward and pleasure. These brain regions also stimulate the neurotransmitter dopamine.

All in all, psychology and neuroscience suggest that giving gifts to other people can be a very rewarding phenomenon that can bring happiness to ourselves and others. What all this means is that when we are kind to others, we are, in a way, being kind to ourselves.

Better Together

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Companionship probably means something different to everyone. It involves more than just someone being there; it is about wanting that person to be there, enjoying their company and developing a relationship that comes naturally to both of you.

Many times, parents of students who did not have, or make friends easily, or were alone most of the time would ask the teacher if they could find companions/friends for them. I always told them that I would plant the seed but the students had to make it grow.  

According to Home Instead Blog, companionship is extremely important for both your mental and physical wellbeing. Having good company around should make you feel relaxed, comfortable and keep your mind positively engaged. http://www.homeinstead.com.au

Other mental benefits of companionship are to:

  • Avoid social isolation
  • Increase a sense of purpose
  • Stimulate positive thoughts and interactions
  • Engage in memory exercises such as reminiscing

I used to criticize my wife and her siblings for constantly talking about the same childhood adventures every time they got together. I knew them verbatim. Now I know why. I was jealous. I never had that experience as a child. I grew up as an only child, alone. I have since asked them for forgiveness. I was the one short-changed.

Some of the physical benefits of companionship are to:

  • Participate in enjoyable physical activities together such as a walk in the park or down the street
  • Identify unhealthy habits
  • Assist with appointments or doctors’ visits
  • Support each other in achieving their goals

Today we try to find companionship through media. Not saying that it never works, but the statistics are not very favorable. It takes a lot of work in the best circumstances. Companionship is important at all stages of life, but more so as you get older.

Ecclesiastes 4 says, “It’s better to have a partner than go it alone. Share the work, share the wealth. If one falls down, the other helps, but if there’s no one to help, tough! Two in a bed warm each other. Alone, you shiver all night. By yourself you’re unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst.

Can you round up a third? A three-stranded rope isn’t easily snapped” The Message Bible.