To comfort a friend, is to actively listen to their concerns, validate their feelings, offer practical help, and encourage them to seek professional help if it is beyond your scope of handling, while also showing empathy and reassurance.

You’re to listen without interruption. Let them express themselves fully without judgment. Validate their feelings and acknowledge that their emotions are valid, even if you don’t fully understand the situation. You’re not there to offer a quick fix and be on your way.

Offer practical support. Ask what you can do Instead of assuming. Ask them what kind of support they need? Offer specific help. Suggest concrete actions like making dinner, running errands, or helping with a project. Make time for them, schedule regular check-ins or activities to show you’re there for them.

Encourage self-care. Suggest activities that can help them relax and de-stress, like taking a bath, reading a book, or whatever they enjoy doing. Remind them to seek professional help If their situation is serious or they’re struggling to cope. Encourage them to reach out to a therapist, counselor, or chaplain. Confidential none judgmental sources.

Express your concern, let them know that you care about them and their well-being. Remind them that they’re not alone. Share your own experiences If appropriate. Share a time when you went through a similar situation and how you coped. Be patient and allow your friend time to process.

You’re really not dealing with their feelings if you’re trying to do any one of these three things, distract, condemn or criticize their behavior, or tell them how to behave. You’re trying to support your friend. Research says that you want to steer clear of advice most of the time unless you are an expert in that field.  

The Bible emphasizes the importance of comforting others, especially friends, by encouraging mutual support, offering words of encouragement, and actively helping those in need.

Scripture tells us that when Job experienced the devasting loss of his children, and afflicted with painful sores on his entire body, it was overwhelming. Three of his friends went to comfort him. They began to weep loudly, tore their robes, and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him (Job 2:12-13).

In the next few chapters, when they opened their mouths to speak, they began to give him poor advice. Research further states that sometimes the best thing to do is show up. Be quiet, after you have said, “I am here for you.” Why is that, because you can make things worse by saying the wrong thing.